Tuesday, March 4, 2014

CAN WHAT I DON’T KNOW .. HURT ME?


By Laura Walcher

Like the rest of you, I read, and read, and read.  So why dont I
know  everything? Maybe its technology. If it didnt keep changing, I would know everything about everything.  Or not.
Heres what I dont get, lately:

Pharrell Williams.  Drake.  Nicki Minaj. Among numerous others whose names you dont recognize, they are the subjects of endless media attention.  Do not despair!  Todays celebrities go no sooner than they come, so if you dont know them to begin with, you wont be taxed with forgetting them when they disappear. 

Eddie Peterson of Mossy Toyota meticulously explained the latest
technological recall, to be added to my routine maintenance. Oh, right.   (I do get his assurance, though: no charge.)

Ai, Ai, Ai!    That would be Weiwei, Chinas best-known artist.   Stick with me here. I read the entire rationale for the point a guy named Maximo Caminero was trying to make for smashing a vase designed by Mr. Weiwei.   It went something like this:  the vase was in a Miami exhibit and Mr. Weiwei is not a Miami artist.  Splat!   Surely a gentleman,  Mr. Weiwei shrugged:  a work is a work what can you do? Its  over, while Mr. Caminero inexplicably regretted that he did something hurtful…” although,its possible that this served to help other artists.  Good heavens.  Maximos from the Dominican Republic, so what about their artists?  So now we know it - but do we get it?

Good news for Trader Joes:  to the disdain of my otherwise admiring friends and family, I dont know - and I dont get - the supposedly enormous difference between two-ish-buck
Chuck and double digit bottles. Striving for popularity, Ive read reams of reasons for the pricier bottles, but they have they failed to inspire me, but better:  sent me back to the bottle-opener, yet again.

New words of the year now includes because.  Jennifer Schuessler in the NY Times sorta explains that because no longer has to be followed by of or a full clause.  So now you can say, because weird, instead of because its
weird.  Wait:  you just want to write it that way it hasnt quite
reached acceptance in verbal communication - has it?

Could I have undertaken the reading necessary to comprehend  Firefox vs.  Safari. ?   The very thought of that nearly sent me back to smoke signals. But since I needed to grasp this unfortunate challenge, my in-house techno-genius saved me:  You dont have to get it all you have to do is push the button.   
Hence,  this column.

Philippe Reines, a less-than-household name, hmmm.  Maybe we should pay attention, since hes the guardian of Hillary Clintons public persona (says  yet another publication for you to read) and were liable to hear more about him as we march toward 2016.  I read all about him - how he told one reporter (via email yet), to f-off, and just lately, revealed that,  I try to speak to reporters as little as possible, just for my own personal health and wellness.  So far,  reading about him  has yet to clarify exactly how hes to be helpful to Hillary.

Finally, theres Fenn.  Hes the new puppy round here, and he came  with a lame leg, which doesnt seem to bother him at all.  Ive  tried to read, to learn, about why he runs like an express train on three legs  - and walks on four.  No dice.


While from habit, I will continue reading, reading, reading, I just dont expect to know much more - about anything. ###

1 comment:

  1. Our greatest endeavor today is to be a filter. What is necessary, what is not. What is important, what is not. What will help us be better human beings, what will not. But when it comes down to it, we still "Chop wood; carry water." Do what we can and try not to hurt anybody.

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