Thursday, June 23, 2016

AIN’T NOBODY’S BUSINESS …


TIMES OF SAN DIEGO, APRIL,  2016

By Laura Walcher


They may not ever tell you, but I’d be willing to bet that my experience will resonate with many women you think you know.

I have two adult children: our son heads a key division of a financial services firm; our daughter’s 15th anniversary of heading up her own public relations firm is coming up this year. They are both healthy, both accomplished. 

In their earliest years, I was a sad and sickly mother. Going through two unexpected pregnancies was not going to benefit their own young lives. Ergo: two abortions followed: one legal, one not. Considering my fragile health, the doctors had advised me to proceed.

Each abortion was a physical relief, and an emotional drain.  Even though my abortions were, and most are, performed before a fetus is viable, the experience is nothing to be celebrated; instead, and I believe I speak for most women, the most – if not the only – positive emotion might be … relief. 

Relief, from difficult expenses; from interference with one’s life path; from the emotional toll of additional children to care for; from – as noted – a negative impact on one’s
health; for youth, for fear, for feelings of inadequacy, embarrassment, and so on.    And, experience has shown us: too often, an unwanted child can be a highly unlucky one as well.

In deciding on abortion, I cannot recall seeking the opinion of others, except for my doctors. I do not recall sharing the decision or experience with others, save my husband and select intimates. Understanding the rationale for my decision, none tried to dissuade me.

While much of life is left to luck, my adult children today lead reasonably balanced, successful lives. I prefer to believe that providing them a stable, attentive mother – has helped. 
 
Amazingly, the abortion beat still goes on. In the courts, in the legislature (for instance, threats to the Affordable Care Act can deprive women of health insurance, under which women may receive reproductive care; Hillary Clinton has called for the repeal of The Hyde Amendment, which prevents federal programs from paying for abortions; among the Republican candidates – all are anti-choice; and so on); in attacks on Planned Parenthood, in churches, synagogues, and the rise of several women’s organizations telling their stories, demanding their right to manage their own lives, their own health, their own options. 

See-sawing too, on abortion has become business as usual, from Supreme Court Justice Anthony to – heaven help us – Mr. Trump. May I advise them to stop; please. Gents, bow out - it ain’t nobody’s business but our own.

Laura Walcher is Principal Public Relations Counsel to J. Walcher Communications, San Diego







Saturday, June 4, 2016



Presidio Sentinel San Diego
June 2016   
  
WHAT NOW? It’s Complicated.
By Laura Walcher

It’s been that kinda May:  half our clan have birthdays;  nearly every non-profit in the city hosts an annual
event;  there’s Mother’s Day;  J. Walcher Communications celebrated its 15th anniversary. We could only nod to Passover, which we missed by a day. 

The birthday kids of May; well, the problem is, they’re no longer kids.  Yeow.  And by now, they have nearly everything they need, so it’s pretty hard to conjure up creative presents.  Jean and Joe gave Uncle Mike socks. (Yawn?)  But Uncle Mike rose, so to speak, to the occasion:  “I wore my new Calvin Kline socks today, “ he wrote to them. “They are uplifting, my mood is better, I am more friendly to people, and everyone is impressed by the positive new me. Plus, I am taller. Thank you. “

The clan can be here for hours, but they never notice
anything – they laugh, eat. Drink.  So, why were they moved to comment on the golf ball that lives in the dish dryer in our sink?  “Mommmm?”   I found it; I saved it. Now it’s mine.

The land-line rings incessantly, unfamiliar voices – recorded and live - grimly or cheerfully urging us into decisions we don’t want to make or money we don’t want to send.  C’mon, awreddy!

You’ve probably been excited to read this far, per no mention of Trump.  Yet.  Who can help it?  May was the bonanza; how many magazine covers did he make? Television appearances, reruns of his appalling attitude, rude opinions, dismissive attacks?  Yet, we’re  publicists; we’d give our ear for such ink.  Or, air. So what if it’s 99 percent negative?  Good name recognition.  Thank me for not listing the gruesome adjectives about him that I can barely resist repeating. Yet, to show you what a good sport I am, here’s a joke:  “Did you hear that two of Trump’s three wives were 
immigrants   ?

Rats: I can’t remember the punch line.   I asked the Mr.  – he remembers everything.
“I can’t think of it,” he said.
 Me: “Who would know?”
 Mr.:  “What’s-his-name would know.”   

Maybe it’s May.

The S.D. Council on Literacy’s “Eat. Drink. Read.” took place at Liberty Station.  Outdoors, fenced area, superb cuisine from a few dozen purveyors and restaurants.  How could one go wrong?  Well, it was May, and it was outdoors, and too many of us didn’t bring our sweaters.

I may recover in June.  We’ll go to see music-master Rey Vinole play for the Horse Shows at the Fair.  How do you play for horse shows, anyway?  Swing. Rock. Latin. March. Western. Great American Song Book show tunes. Eighty-ninety tunes per show, he says.  All to the beat of the hooves; have we clearly underestimated horses? They’ve got rhythm!  But, says Mr. Vinole, any horse that can’t keep the beat can be dismissed.  Not the rider, but the horse.  That’s life.

In the meantime, I’m still writing this in May.  And we’re going to see the documentary about Anthony Weiner. 
That should cheer us up.  ###